Saying ’I love you’ with Ottoman nuance

As there is a lack of references to draw upon, a willingness to keep an open mind about the nature of sexuality is also required. Research has been further hampered by the eager efforts of Turks at the beginning of the new Turkish Republic to eradicate the past. Only in the 1980s was there a change in attitude among Turks toward their Ottoman past. Ottoman women were not kept secluded in harems to the extent portrayed in Western books but had a great deal of freedom. Depending on the family, they might even be well educated. They belonged to their own family and when married, to their husband’s family. If they were widowed, they inherited a specific amount of property, money and the like but they had to remain with their children, especially if there was a son. Any time they wanted to conduct business or any social interaction, they had to go through intermediaries. They could visit relatives and friends, go on picnics or to the hamam and even play an influential role in the marriage of their children. But generally speaking, they were not seen in public unless veiled and accompanied by an escort. The Ottoman sultans were well aware of the advantages that could be gained by marrying the daughters or sisters of powerful people, such as the Byzantine emperor, other rulers in the immediate vicinity, or even ministers within the government. Although these were marriages arranged for advantage to states or people, they could turn into love affairs, even for young women who were bought for or presented to the imperial harem. Several imperial love stories are often retold, starting with Orhan Gazi and the beautiful Nilufer. The girl’s Greek name was Holifera and she was the daughter of the Yarhisar commander. She was to be married to the son of the Bilecik commander and Osman Bey, the founder of the Ottoman dynasty and father of Orhan Gazi was invited to the wedding. But in the meantime, news reached the Ottomans that a trap had been set for them, so in anger, they descended on the wedding and kidnapped the bride. Orhan Gazi’s father, Osman Bey, then decided she should marry his son and they then apparently lived happily together. She was well-known for her charitable works and her son became Sultan Murat I. Although the date of her death is unknown, she was buried with Orhan Gazi in his mausoleum. Fatih Sultan Mehmet’s story is somewhat different. It appears he became tired and began to ignore the day-to-day business of his empire. Gossip started that he had become enamored with a beautiful woman in his harem and eventually news of this reached his ears. He called his advisers together and had the girl brought before him. He then slit her throat, killing her to show that he was not enchanted, but it is said that he regretted this for the rest of his life. There are other stories that say he loved beautiful young boys but in Ottoman culture this would not have been reprehensible anymore than it would have been in, say, Venice at the same time. Kanuni Sultan Suleyman’s lifelong love affair with the beautiful Hurrem Sultan is the story that most people remember. She was a beautiful slave from somewhere in southern Russia, the Ukraine or Crimea and most likely sold by her family into the imperial harem so that they could benefit from the sultan’s generosity if she captured his attention and if she then gave birth to a son, he could inherit the throne. It is said that once she was sure of the sultan’s interest, she took the very dangerous course of becoming a Muslim and refusing sex unless he married her. Suleyman was so infatuated that he agreed and this was the last recorded official marriage of any sultan. Although agreeing to this, she never lived to see their son become sultan. She died before Sultan Suleyman and was buried separately from him in the cemetery next to the Suleymaniye Mosque in ıstanbul. Aimee was captured by Algerian corsairs and because of her beauty, she was sent to the imperial harem in ıstanbul. So the story goes, she was so beautiful that the sultan Abdulhamid I immediately fell in love with her and made her one of his women. One of the major discrepancies in this story is the girl’s date of birth. One source says 1776 and another 1763. From there it is easy to understand that no one quite knows whether she was old enough to have had a child although she may have been the mother of Mahmud who became sultan in 1808. She was supposedly too young to have been the mother of Selim III. Nonetheless she seems to have been loved despite being the niece of French Empress Josephine and spent the rest of her life in the imperial harem. She was given the name Naksedil which means something like "embroidery of the heart" and as a French woman from Martinique, she was credited with advising Selim II on his attempts to modernize the Ottoman Empire. Man power in loveLike the ancient Greeks and Romans, Ottoman society was built by men and from power wielded by men. Men felt then and often still feel today, more comfortable with other men, and some older well-educated men prefer to be with younger men over whom they can wield power. This made some in the West uncomfortable, so translations of Ottoman poetry often made it seem as if a man was speaking about a female. Nedim’s famous poem "Come with me to Sa’adabad, my swaying cypress," is not about some lithesome young girl but an attractive young man. Numerous stories exist of such relationships because it was not considered anything out of the ordinary.

Non-ottoman love for ottomansWhile many Western writers have concentrated on Ottoman sultans and their wives, concubines and harems, some Westerners who came to ıstanbul for work or inspiration, then fell in love with the women of ıstanbul. The most famous of these is Beyaz Gul (White Rose), the love of Dutch Ambassador Cornelis Calkoen. Even though he is reported to have had quite a few affairs, it is said that he loved her dearly and spent his years from 1727 to 1744 as the envoy to the Ottoman Sublime Porte with her. Eventually, however, the ambassador returned to Holland leaving her behind. The story goes that she died of grief and although he lived until 1767, he never married and died just a short time before he was again assigned to ıstanbul. There is a marble statue of Beyaz Gul in the back garden of the Dutch consulate and gives credence to the rather sad story. Pierre Loti, the pseudonym of writer Louis Marie-Julien Viaud, was born in Rochefort, France in 1850 and came to ıstanbul as part of his career as a naval officer. His book, "Aziyade," is partly autobiographical and partly fiction but it seems that the woman described in the book and he, actually lived near the coffeehouse in Eyup, although the name has been taken by the coffeehouses on top of the hill overlooking the Golden Horn. He returned to France and died in 1923, the woman was apparently long forgotten. Count Amadeo Preziosi was born on Malta in 1816 into nobility. In search of interesting places to paint, he chose ıstanbul. Although he intended to stay only a short time, he became so fascinated with the city that he spent the rest of his life there. Eventually he fell in love and married a woman from the ıstanbul Greek Castelli family and the couple had four children, three girls and a boy. He died in 1882 as a result of a hunting accident.